The trajectory of lives and eternities are in the balance. Laying out guidelines for dating as followers of Jesus will alter lives by keeping people out of toxic and unhealthy relationships (and ultimately marriages). “The one” says you need to find the perfect person. The beauty of marriage is God sustains you despite your flaws. The shells of a shotgun are stuffed with tiny round balls. You are asked to go from a mentality that says “End a relationship as soon as difficulty arises,” to one that says, “Don’t end the relationship regardless of the difficulty that arises.” That’s a tough switch to flip.
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Dating with a trajectory towards marriage means dating with a purpose.
It means dating someone who meets the values and goals you have for a future spouse (more on that later).
Your children’s safety should be your number one priority. Always set aside time alone with your kids as well as alone time with your mate. Hopefully, this is someone you can see yourself marrying. The goal is to make your children comfortable and eventually grow to love your new guy. Children can easily see this as “trying to replace their dad” and will only grow to resent your mate. I know women who have stayed in iffy relationships “for the kids.” This makes even less sense when you’re not married.
You want someone who will encourage and instill the same values in your children. Change and loss are part of life, things everyone has to deal with.
It is heartbreaking to see them make the same mistakes over and over again.
All too often, I see friends continually devastated by their dating experiences. Don’t give them your power by allowing yourself to feel bad.
They were too emotionally entrenched in the experience and could not see how they were creating some of the dynamics. You will probably see a difference in how people interact with you.2.
I myself was a victim of this until I recognized my part in this process and then I began dating and eventually married a man who treats me the way I deserve. Let go of the self defeating thoughts holding you back.
Here are some of the most common dating rules and how they can be used most effectively to guide teens through the world of dating: Pros: You can set an age where most teens have a good maturity level and are able to think independently.
Cons: Not all teens mature at the same rate, so even though your teen comes to that age, he or she may still not be able to handle it.
The Solution: Try using that age as a "review" age.